Why are you here?
“Transformation.”
“Encouragement.”
“The cause.”
“Seeing their faces light up.”
“It’s something I would have wanted when I was their age.”
This was the beginning of my Saturday volunteering at Dress for FREEdom, a one-day extravaganza for girls designed to instill messages of self-worth and prevent human trafficking by opening the doors for long term mentorship through Adorned In Grace Design Studios. Throughout the day I met doctors, real estate agents, temp job office managers, teachers, makeup artists, students, relationship coaches, photographers, and bankers who came from dozens of different churches but have one thing in common: they were here to love girls from the foster care system well. I even volunteered alongside a former Dress for FREEdom attendee who is now volunteering and brought her younger sister. “It was such a special thing for me,” she explained.
As I continued to meet volunteers throughout the day, however, a pattern emerged that caught me by surprise. When I asked volunteers why they were here, the answer nearly every time was, “My friend invited me.”
“My daughter told me about it.”
“My sister came last year and told me I had to come.”
“I know ____.”
It struck me that relationships are the glue that hold all of us together – not just the girls we were serving that day. Relationships are what bring us to the place of change and transformation. What brought us here is exactly what we wanted for each of them.
In a sense, we all arrived at the event on the shoulders of women who led the way for us, whether through encouraging us in our career, guiding us with love and wisdom, or teaching us some of the skills we were now offering. One volunteer who helped with photography shared with me the power of having a mentor in her own life and career. After spending the day at Dress for FREEdom, she was filled with inspiration to pay it forward and give this same gift to other girls who are just like she once was.
“You should have loved me!” Is the cry of every child whose relationships have left them alone and bewildered. You could see the entire room hanging on these words.”
Broken Relationships Affect Young Lives
The reality is, these girls are here because relationships in their lives have not always treated them well. When Holly Schnur from The Reality Project spoke at the end of the day, she addressed the confusion, anger, and shame that is caused by other people’s failures towards us. “You should have loved me!” is the cry of every child whose relationships have left them alone and bewildered. You could see the entire room hanging on these words.
And yet, it is never too late to model a new way – to point towards healthy relationships and patterns that lead to freedom. After her talk, Holly and many other volunteers had the opportunity to discuss this idea of healthy relationships with attendees, speaking words of hope and encouragement over them.
One of my favorite parts of Dress for FREEdom is watching girls look at themselves in the mirror or a photograph and start to see themselves differently. Layers of who the world told them to be are, for a moment, stripped away. I wonder – do they see all they can become? Will they hold their head a little bit higher tomorrow?
I hope so.
What Can We Do?
“I think as far as prevention goes, this generation needs more mentors and role models to sit down and have uncomfortable conversations and help direct these kids in a positive direction,” said Sara Perkins, a survivor and speaker who drove all the way from Bend to volunteer at the event.
“A lot of our youth don’t have someone or someplace to go to learn about healthy relationships or boundaries. It takes a village to bring this generation up. We can choose to be that village!”
“This generation needs more mentors and role models to sit down and have uncomfortable conversations and help direct these kids in a positive direction.” -Sara Perkins, trafficking survivor
At the end of the day, that’s exactly what we were – a village of bankers, doctors, moms, teachers, artists, and friends who believed that together as the body of Christ we can be part of preventing the exploitation of girls in our community. This one-day event is the expression of what happens on a weekly basis at the Adorned in Grace Design Studios in the Portland area and beyond. We want all young women to experience the love, wholeness, and self-worth that come from healthy relationships and knowing Jesus. And so we band together, arm in arm, confident that the links that hold us together in this mission are the very same links that will guide their path to true freedom.
